Until recently I´ve realized how much of a jealous person I am , and honestly its dreadful. I can´t often be happy for someone if its something that i´m somehow interested inn, like weight loss. A friend of my boyfriends joined the Herbalife i previously talked about and has been sticking with it.(unlike me who couldn’t, due to being unable to afford it). He has lost a lot of weight, like around 30+kgs in a few months, which i mean is great for him but for me as a jealous person which cant finish anything.. Well…
It drives me absolutely insane with jealousy .
I would think i am like this due to low self esteem, and a.d.d, i jump between projects and therefor never finishing anything. Maybe Self pitty but since i don´t get quick results like other people due to slow thyroid issues makes my mind even with more raging with jealousy concerning other people.
My psychologists told me that I´m way too hard on myself, but what can i say?
I can´t help it.
Jealous= because low self esteem?
Anyone who agrees with this?
I think in my case I feel way too stupid to be good at anything, since in the past i have put in effort and gained nothing, so when i see somebody progress and succeed in something
I´m thinking the universe is completely against me for some reason?
Like why can I put as much effort or even more and get less out of it than somebody else?
Everybody’s different and works in different ways so one could be follow the wrong path which suits someones head way more than yours?,
Maybe due to the fact you want to be like them? since their way is obviously working for them.
Strange thing is though, one might think and already acknowledge this fact but… sometimes that doesn’t make a difference (how stubborn can one be).
It´s like a viscous circle….
low self esteem- jealousy- realizes why?- acknowledges one should fix it- does nothing about it- low self esteem continues= gets jealous like usual….
AH hard to break out of this … I´m not the best at changing my patterns so.. well
woops? I´m at least trying to attend boxing practices from today despite back issues , and hoping ill stick with it.